My Worst Moment

Dr. Doug Weiss - 10/5/2007

In the addict's active sexually addicted life-style, he rarely thinks of the pain he is causing himself or anyone else. In recovery from sex addiction, when the addiction "talks to you" it will try to sell you as to how "A little bit won't hurt," or "Who will know? You can act out just one more time. You are sober enough. It won't affect your recovery." These and many other lies try to maximize the current benefit to you (i.e., it feels good) and minimize the long term negative effects (i.e., this could be the beginning of two to ten year binge and you'll lose your marriage, business and possibly get a sexually transmitted disease). This addiction is very crafty!

A tool that has helped many recovering addicts maintain recovery is having a negative experience locked in, almost memorized that maximizes the pain and minimizes the pleasure to act out. For some sex addicts this picture could possibly be getting picked up by the police. For others, their worst picture is getting kicked out of the house for good, seeing your child's face when you leave, seeing your spouse cry, hearing a judge say "no visitation privileges," the loss of a job, a flirt with AIDS or abortions. These are only a few of the negative experiences that could occur. You may have one or more painful moments that would minimize the pleasure of acting out. You may want to write down these experiences to remind yourself of them when you are tempted to relapse.

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