Drug and Alcohol Detox Centers Great Falls MT

Your partner or spouse has probably suffered in many ways from your addiction including the inability to be emotionally intimate, financial loss, humiliation due to your behavior and the list goes on. If she is deciding to work this out with you as you recover, you are very fortunate and in my experience you would be in the minority. "What should I tell her?" is one of the first questions I hear from an addict who wants to protect his marriage. Read for more.

Gateway Community Services
(406) 727-2512
401 3rd Avenue North
Great Falls, MT

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Benefits Healthcare
(406) 846-1320
500 15th Avenue South
Great Falls, MT

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Benefis Healthcare
(406) 455-2367
500 15th Avenue South
Great Falls, MT

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Robert Hagstrom, Jr NCC
(406) 245-4005 
Billings, MT

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Rocky Boy Chemical Dependency Center
(406) 395-4837
Rural Route 1 Box 630
Box Elder, MT

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Rocky Mountain Treatment Center
(800) 521-6572
920 Fourth Avenue North
Great Falls, MT

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Kimberly Dickman, NCC
(406) 771-7480 
Great Falls, MT

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Malmstrom Air Force Base
(406) 731-4451
341 MDG/SGOMH
Malmstrom A F B, MT

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Flathead Valley Chemical Depend Clinic
(406) 756-6453
1312 North Meridian Road
Kalispell, MT

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Kathe Randle NCC, MAC
(406) 883-3058 
Polson, MT

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Your Partner's Role in Your Addiction and Recovery

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My Partner

Dr. Doug Weiss - 7/30/2007

Your partner or spouse has probably suffered in many ways from your addiction including the inability to be emotionally intimate, financial loss, humiliation due to your behavior and the list goes on. If she is deciding to work this out with you as you recover, you are very fortunate and in my experience you would be in the minority. "What should I tell her?" is one of the first questions I hear from an addict who wants to protect his marriage. The answer is individually situational. I will offer possible options. You may need a therapy session to help you in this area.

Options
  1. Tell your partner everything.
  2. Tell your partner selective information.
  3. Tell vaguely without details "I had an affair."
  4. Never tell.

Another issue after you decide to tell or not to tell your wife is, how much do you included her in your recovery process. In most cases, your wife will not be a sex addict and will not understand your fantasy, masturbation, pornography or other behavorial struggles. She is not your sponsor. Your sponsor needs to be someone of the same sex. It is helpful for your spouse to be aware of where you are in your recovery. You may want to agree on some questions she can ask you that you will answer honestly.

Example Questions
  1. Have you crossed your bottom line?
  2. Have you masturbated?
  3. How often are you going to meetings?
  4. Review the Five Commandments: prayer, reading, call, meetings, prayer.
  5. Have you acted out with another...

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