Drug and Alcohol Detox Centers Laramie WY

Your partner or spouse has probably suffered in many ways from your addiction including the inability to be emotionally intimate, financial loss, humiliation due to your behavior and the list goes on. If she is deciding to work this out with you as you recover, you are very fortunate and in my experience you would be in the minority. "What should I tell her?" is one of the first questions I hear from an addict who wants to protect his marriage. Read for more.

Wyoming Counseling and Outreach Servs
(307) 721-4164
417 East Fremont Street
Laramie, WY

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Michael Loos, NCC
(307) 766-4002 
Laramie, WY

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Garth Shanklin, NCC, MAC
(307) 268-2696 
Casper, WY

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Curran/Seeley Foundation
(307) 733-3908
610 West Broadway
Jackson, WY

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Burt, John
(970) 482-4334
255 Linden Street Suite 202
Fort Collins, WY

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Peak Wellness Center
(307) 745-8915x251
1263 North 15th Street
Laramie, WY

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The Chrysalis House
(307) 245-3444
P.O. Box 610
Pine Bluffs, WY

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Diane Stroot NCC
(307) 352-6617 
Rock Springs, WY

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Transitions Family Counseling and
(307) 682-8617
801 East 4th Street
Gillette, WY

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Northern Wyoming Mental Health Center
(307) 674-7702
1043 Coffen Avenue
Sheridan, WY

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Your Partner's Role in Your Addiction and Recovery

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My Partner

Dr. Doug Weiss - 7/30/2007

Your partner or spouse has probably suffered in many ways from your addiction including the inability to be emotionally intimate, financial loss, humiliation due to your behavior and the list goes on. If she is deciding to work this out with you as you recover, you are very fortunate and in my experience you would be in the minority. "What should I tell her?" is one of the first questions I hear from an addict who wants to protect his marriage. The answer is individually situational. I will offer possible options. You may need a therapy session to help you in this area.

Options
  1. Tell your partner everything.
  2. Tell your partner selective information.
  3. Tell vaguely without details "I had an affair."
  4. Never tell.

Another issue after you decide to tell or not to tell your wife is, how much do you included her in your recovery process. In most cases, your wife will not be a sex addict and will not understand your fantasy, masturbation, pornography or other behavorial struggles. She is not your sponsor. Your sponsor needs to be someone of the same sex. It is helpful for your spouse to be aware of where you are in your recovery. You may want to agree on some questions she can ask you that you will answer honestly.

Example Questions
  1. Have you crossed your bottom line?
  2. Have you masturbated?
  3. How often are you going to meetings?
  4. Review the Five Commandments: prayer, reading, call, meetings, prayer.
  5. Have you acted out with another...

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